Day 11 of September, “Year Twelve”

Day 11 of September “Year Twelve”
The Hope Within the Storm Collection

Of the PTSD Poetry Project 2016


(The Last Poem of the Project 2016)


Day 22 of 22,


Each day approximately 22 veterans commit suicide. There are no statistics to tell us how many attempt suicide, have thoughts of suicide, or have survived suicide. There are none to tell us how many experience PTSD, get help and live a life beyond PTSD.

May we never allow their sacrifice for our freedoms to be belittled nor forgotten. You can make a difference you only have to ask ‘how can I help their voices to be heard?’



“Year Twelve”

(I remember)



I remember this day with clarity

It began so happy

So full of hope

A new life begun together

Forms filled out

Forms signed

Pictures taken

I see the happy as if from afar

Then the world exploded

And became full of insanity

This day

Like no other day

What happens next

We asked each other

Months later we left

For a new life together

One which would end abruptly

Because of something

I cannot name

I will not name

I remember those eyes

Looking into mine

Those lips kissing mine

Our bodies so joyous

Until this fateful day

Chosen for we knew not why

It began as any other day

Happy

Hopeful

Joyful

Smiles

Kisses

Holding hands

Walking up stairs

To sign papers

To make our bond for life

Or so we thought

Memories all so far far away

Deep within my mind

Yet this one

This singular day

Will not leave me

Even when I forgot your name

I remember your face

I remember the feel of your skin

I remember everything about you

Even though I forgot your name

You were still in my heart

Deeply connected to my soul

Tears still do not happen

When I most need them to fall

All I can do is express anger

Even this emotion is fleeting

I wish to cry

I wish to scream

I wish to sob

Until I cannot breathe

I feel all this well up within me

Like a wave which never crests

All this emotion

I can only put onto paper

I look up at the sky

And remember you

Although I forgot your name

My heart remembers

This I will never forget

I was loved beyond measure

I was loved like no other

I had joy

I had love

I had happy songs

I had happy tears

I had purpose

This day I will not forget

But I have let go of your name

The autumn approaches

This year it will not take me down

For I have finally

Gratefully

Grieved and let it all go

 


***


This is the last poem of the PTSD Poetry Project 2016 and the end of over 100 days of writing for the project’s completion.


For more information about the PTSD Poetry Project 2017 please follow:


 https://ptsdpoetryproject2017.wordpress.com/category/the-ppproject2017-information/


Discover how you can bring your voice to the project. 


     “Thank you for allowing me to share my words with you through this incredible journey of over 100 days of writing. It has changed my life and allowed me to better understand healing takes time. This personal project brought forth the voice of my arduous journey with PTSD, Traumatic Brain Injury and Multiple Sclerosis. It is an ongoing path upon which I am grateful to continue walking.

     –Bree Nowacki



                                                                                      THANK YOU

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