Day 9 of September, “Year Ten” 

Day 9 of September
“Year Ten”


The Hope Within the Storm Collection


Of the PTSD Poetry Project 2016


(
“Year Ten” was written about the first year after Traumatic Brain Injury which occurred in October 2013. )


Day 20 of 22






“Year Ten”




I sit and stare at the screen


Alive with movement


I don’t even care


I sit


I stare


I won’t remember the story anyway


I sit


I stare


I am merely existing


I go to appointments


Meant to help me heal


I go to appointments


Meant to lead me back to me


I sit


I stare


I look at the clock


Which tells me four hours have passed


I’m unaware of time now


I sit


I stare


Will my life always be like this?


I interact with no one


I cannot follow conversation


I sit


I stare


Until a softness begins


I remember one thing


Then I remember another


I wait


And wait


Something is happening


Inside my head


I am beginning to remember


As my body has begun healing


So has my brain


Slowly


So very slow


Fits and spurts of growth


Then stagnation for awhile


I read and reread journals


Hoping to stir a response


My brain is not yet ready


I wait


This time so very patiently


I wait


Time moves on


Without me realizing


Months have passed now


More healing happens


It’s becoming easier to look others in the eye


It’s becoming easier to censor my words


It’s becoming easier to not blurt all my words at once


I walk and walk


I walk it seems for hours


My body, in its stagnation


Has become stubborn


So I walk and walk


Telling it


We are okay now


It’s okay to let go


We are no longer starving


We are no longer in distress


We are finally in active healing


It is okay


To finally let go




***


Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s